T h e L i v i n g M e m o r y O f Y o u
by Zaerix
Summary: AU. A Reunion is nigh, between the Wanderer, the Prisoner, the Hero and the Loveless.
1. The Loveless

Bringing it all back, and giving it another shot.

Disclaimer: Any characters from SE obviously not mine.

* * *

 **THE LOVELESS**

The hard part was over now. Right?

At least Tifa hoped it was over. There were times when she thought if all the fighting they had done was even worth it. If even her death was worth it. It's been a year now since the Lifestream had fought back against Meteor, and for some reason - no-one had even begun to think what would happen after, it all happened too fast for any of them to understand what was going on. It wasn't all rainbows and sunshine, like the small part of Tifa had wished. It was just more destruction and blood. People got used to the rubble and unstable buildings, to the people who were staggering across the streets for what seemed like months on end after their homes were simply pounded into dust in just a millisecond. Those who were alive suffered - the poor, rich, old and young. Those that had eventually died... Tifa had often found herself wondering if they were the lucky ones.

Cloud started to disappear every now and again. It started off with a few nights. He was silent about it, sneaking off like a cat in the middle of night and mounting on Fenrir. She wasn't sure if he thought she knew. And every night after that, since the first night he had left, she wouldn't sleep until late to hear the sound of his boots carefully treading past the kids' room, pausing for a moment at her door, and then making their way downstairs, always waiting to hear the exhaust to blast off and the low rumble of Fenrir dissipating into the distance. Those nights eventually turned into days and the days turned into weeks.

Tifa was glad she had Seventh Heaven to preoccupy her. Barret was right on that one, work definitely had kept her mind off of things. Everyone seems to think that she was good at words. She wasn't really. Expressing herself wasn't her strongest trait - being tough and stubborn at the right time, maybe - but saying her thoughts out loud? Not a biggest a fan. It was a rough combination, those two. Everytime they were around each other it was like walking on eggshells, she always wondered what was he thinking in that bright yellow head of his.

It wasn't always like that, even right after what had happened two and a half years ago. Cloud was more optimistic, probably even more optimistic than Tifa. It was Barret who suggested opening up a bar which she was unsure about, but Cloud had smiled and reassured her that if the going gets tough, we'll just quit. And then after what felt like living on borrowed time, they had to move on somehow. They managed to open up the bar. Barret went off to deal with things on his own for a while and left Marlene to their care. Cloud had saved up quite a stack of Gil to modify Fenrir. And until recently, maybe it's been two months already, he brought home a boy sickly with the 'Stigma. Denzel, he said his name was, as he hid behind Cloud like a shy puppy. It was like a family, just like Barret had said to Marlene before he left, and it was Cloud and Tifa's job to nurture it.

Only, it's probably more better to describe it as dysfunctional.

She wondered where Cloud was right now, that worrisome feeling gnawing at the corners of her heart. Maybe he's on a long delivery trip. She knows he started to expand his routes. She heard him talking about it to the kids a few days before he left for Gaia knows where. She remembers one time last year when he said he'll be gone for a week to Costa Del Sol for a massive delivery of scrap metal sheets. She expected him to come shuffling back with rigid arms and an awkward stride because his fair skin would probably get cooked underneath all that sun, but was surprised when she saw that he tanned pretty well. Maybe it was the heat that day - it was a summer - seeing Cloud like that really made her fluster.

But it's been more than ten days already. He didn't say where or why he was going. He left a note on the fridge. Out on a delivery, be back soon. Say bye to Denzel and Marlene for me. It was a blatant lie and he knew it. Tifa didn't know what to feel and what to do. Her mind was angry and there was a heavy feeling in her chest. And he hasn't called back. She left him voicemails everyday, asking him how he is, asking him what he's eaten for the day and asked him the million Gil question: "When are you coming back, Cloud?"

Tifa's gazed at the ceiling, watching the blades from the ceiling fan turn and turn as she wiped the rim of a crystal ale glass with the cloth that was laying on her right shoulder. There were quite a few customers in this relatively humid afternoon, and the buzz of chatter filled the bar as they enjoyed a couple of nice cool beverages.

Her eyes scanned around the room, picking up a few conversations from the people who sat at the bar front. On a long day like this, it was quite entertaining to eavesdrop on what they've got to say. Sometimes the customers talk to you, sometimes you talk to them, but other times Tifa preferred to just listen and be in her own little world.

"... don't give a shit about the Wutai Warriors man! Last time they played in the league they barely even survived!"

"Oh yeah? The Trouts don't stand a chance in this years league."

"Hey! Whatcha gotta say about the Junon Trouts? That's my hometown-"

"I just don't get him sometimes. I really thought he was gonna ask this time."

"He doesn't deserve you, honey."

"This dude, I gotta tell ya, he looked he was on drugs or something. He's all buff and beat up and shit. Came up to me, looked me dead in the eye with these like crazy eyes, like they were LITERALLY glowing at me. I really thought it was gonna be over for me, man."

One conservation in particular was something she wasn't quite ready in hearing.

"... haven't seen that hot blonde guy in a while."

"Looks like he's left her."

"Poor girl. Can't imagine if Daniel walked out on me and the kids like that."

"They always say it's another woman. "

"Even with the kids? Honestly, most men are just a piece of trash!"

"You know - I've heard that the boy isn't even theirs."

"Maybe it's the guy's son with someone else-"

Tifa had heard enough of the gossip.

She set the ale glass a little too hard on the sink so that a section of the thin rim chipped off. Tifa opened her mouth to say something, she wasn't quite sure what, a retaliation maybe, but bit her tongue and chose against it. Choose your battles Tifa, she thought to herself.

Then a little voice behind the bar spoke up.

"You're wrong! He didn't leave us! Tifa told us he went on a long trip somewhere and he's coming back! And for the record - they are our Mom and Dad!"

"Marlene!" Tifa scolded. She didn't even realise she was there! The six-year old stood atop a stool, her head the only thing you can see from behind the otherside of the bar front.

For a moment, Marlene's eyes widened in shock at the sound of Tifa's stern voice. Then she stomped her little foot, tears welling up in her eyes.

"You promised Papa that we'll be a real family! You promised that you'll both love each other and me and Denzel!"

She scurried off with her little legs, stomping up the stairs and Tifa heard a door being shut too forcefully.

The two ladies were slightly bewildered at what just happened. Marlene's voice was small, but it caused enough for the ambient hum of the bar to slightly decrease and catch the attention of a few people closer to the bar front. For what felt like an eternity of being in the limelight, the buzz started to pick up again and people seemed to ignore what they heard.

The women in front of her exchanged nervous glances with each other before thanking Tifa for the drinks, and dropping quite a reasonable amount of Gil in the tip-jar. Tifa managed to let out a smile as they headed out towards the door.

"Please, come again!" she called out. The women didn't hear or probably ignored her as they resumed to their chatter as they walked out of the bar.

They turned right, as she watched them through the window her eyes caught sight of something spiky and blonde floating on the other side of the street. Her heart skipped a beat. When she squinted, trying to look past the glare of the sun against the metal '7th Heaven' sign, she realised it was only a kid hoisting a chocobo plushie on his shoulders.

She let out a breath.

She figured she'll have to deal with Marlene later.

Two knocks.

"Can I come in?" Tifa asked in a soft voice. She popped her head through the door and saw Marlene clutching a chocobo figurine in her small hands, and trotting it by Denzel's feet.

Marlene stayed silent for a while and gave in.

"Yeah…"

"How's Denzel coping?" Tifa whispered, a she walked by Denzel's bedside and placed a glass of orange juice and a plate of sandwiches down. She took lifted the damp cloth that lay on his forehead. It was warm and underneath it was oozing pus. It looks like the poor boy's 'Stigma was neither getting worse nor any better. Tifa took it as a good sign, for now at least. She shoved away the dirty cloth in a plastic bag and doused a new one in a bowl filled with cold water she had laid on the other bed, wringed the water out, and placed it carefully on his forehead.

"He's okay." Marlene mumbled.

She continued to look at Denzel's face, pushing back his fringe. It was far too long now, he won't be able to see anything through that curtain of hair. He'll freak when he finds out they're gonna have to cut it.

"Marlene?"

Silence.

"Marlene, we have to talk about what happened earl-"

"I'm sorry, Tifa!" the girl burst into tears.

Tifa stretched her arms out to her and Marlene allowed herself to be picked up and carried by Tifa's side. Marlene had grown, that's for sure. Tifa had felt the change in weight and size in her arms. The girl laid her head on her shoulder as her mother cradled her, soothing her and telling her to hold her tears.

"Don't cry Marlene…" Tifa began. "I told you remember? Cloud will come back."

"He's taking too long." her voice was muffled by Tifa's hair.

She thought for a moment.

"You know what I think, Marlene?" she propped the little girl down at the edge of the bed, and kneeled down in front of her. "I think he's taking too long because he has to knock down all those monsters to finish the delivery." Another blatant lie. Marlene won't be fooled. But Tifa had said it sometimes to reassure herself that that is a plausible reason he hasn't come home yet. A few minor delays - that's all.

"I guess Cloud isn't that strong anymore." Marlene gave a small smile. If she knew Tifa was lying, then she was probably smart enough to play along.

She patted Marlene's head and nodded. Cloud is fighting, Tifa was sure of that. But he was fighting something a little bit different than hybrid monsters.

"Tifa, why did you let them say it?"

She furrowed her brows slightly in confusion and finally understood what she had meant.

"Because Marlene, sometimes... we have to choose our battles." She took the six-year old's small hands and enclosed it with her own palms. "Gossip is never a battle worth fighting for."

"Is it because it's true?"

Looks like he's left her. Tifa's heart clenched and she had to stay silent for a while just so she wouldn't hear her voice falter. She rubbed her hands over Marlene's head.

"No, baby. It's not true." Marlene could smell a lie just as well as Tifa can. If she knew it was a lie, then Marlene was really good at playing along.

"Cloud loves you guys," she continued. "He loves his family remember?"

"You're part of our family too, Tifa."

Tifa let out a laugh, but Marlene could tell it was a sad laugh. Tifa bent her head low to kiss Marlene's small and delicate fingers, while she quickly wiped a tear that appeared at the corner of her eye.

"I know Cloud loves you too."

Tifa planted another kiss on the top of her head as she got up from her knees. She didn't reply to Marlene, there was no need to.

"You know how I know?" Tifa was glad that Marlene didn't seem so sad anymore. The girl had started bouncing a little bit on the empty bed. "It's because in Loveless, the boy looked at the girl weirdly and he said he was in love with her and, and sometimes me and Denzel watch Cloud look at you with the same weird face!"

Loveless? As hopeful as that sounds, as innocent as the children may seem about love, Tifa's heart chose not to believe it.

"So who's been letting you watch Loveless, huh?" Tifa asked, warningly.


	2. The Reunion

_**Update 29.03.18:** Should be fine now! File must have been corrupted or something. I also changed one sentence in the third chapter, so I reuploaded that too._

* * *

 **THE REUNION**

Cloud knew that he shouldn't have gone, but yet he did. What came over him he didn't know, but he was unsure of everything these days anyway. He kept the bouquet of lilies in a box, and stuffed the box in a compartment he had installed on Fenrir. Something to keep them from getting crushed during the journey to the Forgotten Capital.

The lilies had been from Elmyra. She had phoned in a few months ago regarding a special delivery. Apparently, word had travelled to Kalm bringing news of an up and running business centred in the city of Edge, that goes by the name of _Strife Delivery Service._ As soon as she had heard the name, Elmyra had to make a call and check. She had offered a larger sum of Gil than usual for the job, but since it _was_ a special delivery, Cloud decided to offer her a free service.

He was cruising on Fenrir for four hours straight from the centre of Bone Village now and the ride was far from comfortable. Maybe it's time for a break, he's not far from the Forgotten Capital. They didn't have many main road routes so it was a little bit harder to steer Fenrir around the twists and turns. Cloud was glad that he managed to adjust Fenrir with added suspensions, otherwise there was no chance it would have survived the uneven terrain. It was a lot more better than the dreary landscape of Midgar's outskirts though - he had always found it hard to keep himself awake when everything you see is the same shade of dust and dirt.

Yeah, he really needed a break.

He spotted an inn up ahead the narrow road and parked Fenrir outside. He pressed a button on the handle, and spikes emerged at the bottom of Fenrir's wheels. Another additional precaution - just in case anyone wanted to elope with his ride.

As Cloud headed for the bar inside the shabby inn, it'll probably occur to anyone who's from Edge that this was no 7th Heaven, figuring that he probably was the only customer. The windows were too small and the lights were shabby, and the bartender was anything but friendly looking. But he wasn't complaining. Cloud settled himself on a wooden seat at the bar front.

"What's it gonna be?" the man behind the bar bellowed. He crossed his big burly arms, arms that were the size of Cloud's quadriceps.

"Corel Wine." he simply replied.

"Sorry lad. Ran out the other day." _The wine or the customers?_ Cloud mused. The guy had a thick North Corelian accent, which was actually quite common around the Northern Continent.

"You got any Gin?"

"Junon or Cactuar?"

"Junon."

"Out of that too." Cloud sighed in frustration. Then why did he even ask?

The bartender grunted and started to clunk around with the various assortment of alcohol bottles that he had displayed on the shelves behind him.

Cloud reached for his phone in his back pocket. Seven missed calls. Seven voicemails. All from Tifa. He wasn't in the mood. It had crossed his mind that maybe he should call back, but what's the use? Either they'll fight over the phone, or beat around the bush from any real and deep meaningful conversation, like how Marlene had pointed out before. It was a vicious cycle that Cloud had set up for himself that Tifa and the kids were suffering for.

"Woman troubles?" the bartender asked. He slid the glass of Junon Gin towards Cloud, who was not hesitating to down it all, the burning feeling of Junon Gin clearly not phasing him. The man before him raised a single brow as he watched the troubled young man with an outrageous set of hair, ignore his question and set the now empty glass hard on his wooden bar top.

"Thought so." the bartender grumbled, sizing him up. "You look like a fighter. _You a fighter?"_

 _I don't know._ Cloud didn't say anything. Not in the mood for conversation.

"You definitely ain't a talker, that's for sure."

And then it hit him. It stung from his skin, a fiery hot pain searing into his muscles. Cloud made an effort not to show it but failed. He raised his right hand and clutched his left arm that he kept shrouded. It was warm and moist and looked at his fingers that were now covered in the black pus. It was starting to seep through.

 _Nngh!,_ Cloud breathed out in short raspy breaths. He'd take a stab to the chest any day, even the feeling of that pain was more numbing than this one.

The bartender, taken aghast at Cloud's sudden movements watched him with wide eyes. "You got Geostigma?" he barked. The question sounded more of an accusation than anything.

"No _shit_." Cloud managed to say through gritted teeth. The sharp blast of pain had began to subside. His brain hurt less, now that they weren't bombarded with blinding images.

The bartender waited for a moment, unsure of what to do. Then his face had straightened, his mouth tight-lipped.

"Get out of my bar." he walked around the bar front. Cloud had got up before he had a chance to start shooing him away and dropped a handful of Gil on the counter.

"Gladly." Cloud was still clutching his arm. The dressing really needs to be changed. He forgot to change it before he started journeying from the centre of Bone Village. Tifa would have remembered.

Not many people outside of larger-populated areas like Midgar were ever in contact with Geostigma. If they were - people would treat it as something sinful. He said to himself that it was more of a punishment rather than a wrong-doing. Contagious or not - it didn't matter anymore. This would be his ordeal.

" _So does Denzel even matter?" Tifa was no longer trying her best to maintain composure. The kids were in school. They didn't need to put up a front like they usually do._

" _That's not what I'm saying Tifa!" he was starting to raise his voice._

" _Well then you should go on and say it, 'cause clearly I'm not getting the memo." she attacked quickly. Her words carried hurt and anger all convoluted into one._

" _You know what? Forget it." Cloud raised his arms in mocking defeat and trudged out of the bar and hopped onto Fenrir. A part of him said that he should go back. But he didn't._

The Forgotten Capital was eerily quiet. There was no wind here, only the deafening sound of silence matched with Fenrir's roaring engine as they moved past the trees with a faint white glow, but even then their branches didn't move.

The lake water was still. He remembered the last time he was there. He watched her die, and watched how her face disappeared to the bottomless pit below. This place felt anything _but_ holy to him. Elmyra had specific instructions for him. Take the lilies, cut their stems and spread out each flower across the lake. That's how she had wanted it, and that's what he did.

As he placed each flower one by one, and let them drift off into the expanse of the lake, it was almost mesmerizing to watch the the ripples they would make. One ripple would hit another, and then they would make an even bigger one. Somehow, the flowers still seemed to drift towards the Ancient's Temple all at once, even though there was _still_ no breeze here in the Capital. The lake was like a black mirror, the ripples made them look like as if they were looked broken shards. When Cloud gazed at his distorted reflection, he thought he heard a whisper… He continued to stare, trying to make sense of the reflection of his face.

...Was it just him or were his eyes glowing even more than usual?

…. _Cloud...Cloud...Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud…_

He brought his face up close to the water, looking past his reflection and through that deep bottomless pit below. What would happen next, he didn't expect. He felt a rushing gust of wind from behind him, like a single beating pulse, and out spoke a sharp and frantic whisper that was once familiar to him. Too familiar.

 _She's coming!_

If it wasn't for that sudden warning that nearly gave him a heart attack and brought him on his arse, his body would have been dragged to the sky, by the _thing_ that emerged from the water below causing a jet of water to follow it like a tail. And once he caught sight of what that _thing_ was floating in the star-studded night above, he barely managed to take a breath before they locked eyes. He's seen it before. Its face turned into a sinister smile. Like being caught with a bear, Cloud didn't make a move. Making the decision for a split second, he broke off into a run towards Fenrir, towards Tsurugi.

But the boy that ran was merely just an ant. It let him run. Itt won't let him get the prize. He was fast, but just not fast enough.

Cloud almost lost his balance when it landed in front of him, feet planted straight into the ground, the force of its landing reverberating through the ground. But using his momentum, he managed to leap into the air and flip over it, with an acrobats' grace. He would have managed to grab Tsurugi from Fenrir's hidden compartments, if he hadn't taken the chance of trying to overcome the extent of its strength and abilities. All it took was a simple reach for his left leg, and then he was sent hurtling down across the lake with so much force that he didn't even sink, but skidded across the water, his back crashing into the Temple. The throw had blew the air out of his lungs, and he started finding it hard to breath. A punctured lung or a broken back. Even then he still tried to weigh which was worse.

He closed his eyes for a moment grimacing from the pain, and suddenly she was there, grappling him by the neck with his toes barely touching the ground.

Each breath hurt like a thousand Masamunes skewering through him.

" _Cloud Strife."_

A voice of recognition. He looked at her eye that glowed purple. An ominous smile playing on her lips, her sickly skin almost transparent. Her breath was ice cold on his neck, and even though she had no limbs, there was a grip so powerful that he felt his throat was being crushed. The 'Stigma on his left arm burned like fire.

…. _Cloud...Cloud...Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud. Cloud…_

The whispers began to get louder, until it was the only thing he can focus his mind to.

That persistent smile stayed on her face, and she didn't even have to move her mouth to say the most foreboding of all greetings.

" _We meet again."_

Cloud struggled in the strength of her invisible choke hold. His vision was suddenly turning dark. If this was going to be his last, he forced himself to remember every memory he cherished.

That was his mistake. His eyes widened and the glow of her eye just intensified even further, as soon as he heard her words echo in his mind, spreading like a plague.

" _Tell me, Cloud Strife…. what is it that you cherish most in this world? I might just have the pleasure of taking it away from you."_


	3. The Prisoner's Return

**THE PRISONER'S RETURN **

_Tifa._

It was around 5 o'clock in the morning when she found herself, tucked away in one of the tight little booths in the bar, the blanket that she had no longer covering her legs but was draping over the seat, sprawling across the floor. She sat up and stayed silent for a moment, with a false sense of hope she listened quietly to hear something different about the bar. The only thing you can hear was the beating ticks, and swinging pendulum of the wall-clock right above her.

It had been a long night at the bar, a Wednesday usually being a sports night. This sports night however was much more rowdier than usual, with all sorts of characters you could find around Edge all gathered into one at 7th Heaven, taking up whatever space they could find to watch the League play-offs on the television screen. It was like an orchestra, all the men, women and children chanting their 'Ooohs' and 'Aaahs' in harmonious unison. At around the half-time, it was clear that the Midgar Giants had no ounce of a chance against the Junon Trouts, but nevertheless people didn't give up on expressing their pent up frustration throughout the whole evening. Tifa asked Denzel and Marlene if they wanted to stay up late to watch the match, but as expected Marlene wasn't interested in "people chasing around for a ball" and as for Denzel, he watched it by himself on the much smaller television that they kept in the kitchen while Tifa was tending at the bar front. She figured that he didn't want to catch people staring. He's had enough of unkind encounters.

Cloud was the one who actually bought the wide-inch television for the bar, telling her that it could be useful one day. Turns out it was pretty handy - she managed to get possibly everyone around Edge to settle into her bar and ordering drinks. Business is looking quite promising again. Sure it was tough work trying to handle more than one drink at a time, but it was nothing that she hadn't done before.

It took her a few more minutes before she finally came to her senses, a feeling lingering at the back of her mind that she has just woken up from a dream that she knew she'll end up forgetting throughout the day. That slightly annoyed her because ever since she was a little girl, she noted down every single dream and nightmare she would have in her dream diary with as much detail as she can. Now that she's grown up and after everything that has happened, she lost track of that habit and would often prompt Marlene to try it out for herself.

 _Today is another new day,_ she reminded herself.

She heard the ring of a bicycle bell outside. It was just about sunrise and the streets outside were filled with a warm glow. The paper was boy doing his rounds, and he was having a chat to Margie, the elderly lady who sold flowers on the other side of the street. Like Tifa, Margie was an early riser, and she was just beginning to set up her outdoor stalls at the front of her shop. Tifa spotted a familiar kind of flower, white and yellow lilies, a bunch of them placed inside a wicker basket that Margie was carrying. A thought crossed her mind, and one of the yellow lilies fell gracefully out of the basket.

Margie bent down slowly to pick it up, and her eyes glanced up towards 7th Heaven, a large smile forming on her face, as she spotted Tifa by the window, probably wondering why the beautiful young lady looked so sullen. No-one should be feeling sullen at her age, maybe she should teach that girl a lesson on how they would have fun back in her day. Margie wished that Tifa's smile would be a lot more genuine - everyone that hovered around that young lass don't seem to notice but nothing gets past ol' Margie, that's what she'd used to tell her grandchildren. Oh how she wishes they were still here. Almost eighty-years of living and she knows when a soul is lonely. Speaking of which where was that blonde boy with the disruly hair?

Tifa broke from her thoughts when she spotted Margie's beaming smile, as she made her way out of the bar. The paper boy, who was now riding away down the rest of the neighbourhood, had already dropped a paper on the steps of 7th Heaven, and Tifa picked it up on her way to Margie's stalls.

"Good morning, my dear!" Margie greeted. As frail as she was, the fullness of her voice was far from faltering.

"Morning Margie, how are you doing today?" Tifa smiled.

"Oh I'm just here, setting up my lovely flowers." Margie noticed how Tifa glanced at her yellow and white lilies. She followed the gaze of the young lass' brown eyes. How sad they seemed.

"Would you like one dear?" Margie asked softly.

"Oh - oh no," Tifa chuckled "It's just that, lilies are something special to me."

"Lilies don't suit you." Margie muttered.

"Sorry?"

"Carnations. The pink kind. They symbolise the strength and love of a _woman_ and as a _mother_. Your bar would look much more lively if you added a spot of colour to it!"

 _A mother?_ Tifa looked back at the bar and watched how the slightly breeze swayed the rusting metal sign. _Hm, maybe it does need a makeover_.

To appease the woman, she took out a handful of Gil from her money pouch that she had forgotten to take off last night. Margie protested.

"There's no need for that my dear! This is my present from me to you." the old woman walked over to her basket of pink carnations, picked out a few and tied them together into a small bouquet. Tifa gave her thanks, wondering why Margie would do such a thing.

"I remember these flowers. Anemones." Tifa's voice was soft as feather, as she spotted all kinds of different anemones that Margie had in her stall. She held one of the purple anemone petals with a gentle touch. Those were the flowers that her mother had liked.

Back in Nibelheim, they used to call them the lonely maiden, because that is what they symbolized. Loneliness. They grew in abundance at the cliff edges of Mount Nibel where it was the hardest to reach and the windiest by far. On really stormy and windy days, the older petals would break away from the flower and the backwater town of Nibelheim would be shrouded in white, purple and red as the wind allowed them to settle on their rooftops, streets and gardens. Tifa had loved the colours. There were some people that took the fallen petals and ground them up in medicine. But it can also be a poison. She remembered when the doctor had visited Mama. That was the first time she saw her drink it, and when it was time for her to have her daily dose, Papa would shut the door behind him so that she wouldn't see.

Margie stared at Tifa, holding on to the pink carnations that she had tied up in a bouquet for her, and understood.

"A young woman with a future ahead of you shouldn't feel so lonely." She handed Tifa the pink carnations. "Look at me, an old woman like me has no future left here on this Planet, but I don't feel even an ounce of loneliness!"

"Don't say that, Margie."

"My days are numbered now. You can't shy away from the truth Tifa. You're lonely. Admit it. If you can't admit it to anyone else, admit it to yourself."

"I'm not lonely. I have Marlene and Denzel." Tifa countered.

"You are the most stubborn in the strangest ways. Reminds me of my daughter." Margie grumbled, wagging her finger.

Tifa looked at Margie. She must have been beautiful when she was young, the face that she had now accentuated that, still retaining that youthfulness.

"How do you do it Margie?" Tifa asked almost not realising that she opened her mouth to speak, her voice as soft as ever, frightened at what Margie would say. Somehow, without indicating what it is, Margie understood what she meant.

The old lady's eyes shone with a wisdom that could only be acquired from years of living. She gestured to her flower shop.

"You see this Tifa? This was… an accident. I didn't know I wanted to sell flowers in Midgar, the thought never crossed my mind. But as young people do, they meet someone - someone who would be very special to them - even for how briefly they come to know each other. The flower shop just happened. I was one of the lucky few who would get to know them for years and years, until there was nothing we can hide from one another.

"And like how all stories go, we grew old together but he went away a little too early. I'm that crazy old hag who spouts loads of nonsense that I believe are true about the Lifestream. These flowers… they grow with the essence of life. The life from our loved ones, even if they are dead. My kids and grandchildren were living in Sector 7. I was living in Sector 5. But I've come to terms with it now... these flowers remind me of that."

Tifa's mind was screaming, her eyes almost brimming with tears as the guilt stabbed at her heart. _But how do I tell you Margie? How can I make it up to you? Would you still think that way if you found out what I did?_

Margie took Tifa's hand and stared at her eyes, as if she saw right through her.

"I've lost but I've forgiven. That's one thing I've learnt throughout my long life."

And just like her mother had used to do right before she'd go to school, she cupped one side of Tifa's face and tucked a stray hair behind her ear.

"Now I think you came here for a favour." Margie finally said and smiled at the look on the young girl's face. She really did remind her of her daughter.

"It's a mother's intuition." the old woman had simply said as she tapped the side of her nose, and laughed a laugh that no-one who had lived less than seventy-years could have managed.

It's been a long time since she'd been here. It had frightened her to come back, guilty at the fact that she's been trying to forget, which had also involved not coming back to this place. It was such a strangely beautiful sight in the midst of the Midgar ruins, and even before everything had broken down around it, it seemed like a perfect place for solace. There was something in the way the broken roof let the right amount of light fall inside it that marked it as _her_ place.

Something had told her to come here. It was scratching her at the back of her mind ever since she woke up that morning, and ever since she spotted the same white and yellow lilies in Margie's stall that are resting on that small patch dirt, where an altar is meant to be.

She asked her if Denzel and Marlene can stay in her shop for the day, while she runs off to do some errands. Being in back in the ruins of the Sector 5 Slums reminded her of the days when she was an inexperienced barmaid at the first 7th Heaven. Staring was never a good custom in Nibelheim, but clearly in Midgar people seemed to care less about it. Back then, she also hated how Midgar never really had any of the wild fruits and vegetables that Nibelheim had.

Walking through the church now, past the pews that collected dust these past years, the lilies still remained at the front of the church. They were untouched, as if time was the maiden who had protected it. She had no reason to go there, but it was the place that she figured Cloud may have been. And she had been right. Well, _almost_ right.

Near the patch of lilies was a lantern, a metal box, and a rolled up sleeping bag. He's been camping out here. There were a couple of first aid supplies strewn about, gauzes, needles and cotton swabs. When she walked over to it her heart instantly dropped and grabbed a long length of cloth, dirtied with a black stain - the same black stains she would find on Denzel's pillowcase. So is this why?

"Why didn't he say something?" Tifa whispered to herself.

He was suffering more than she thought. A part of her wanted to scold Cloud if she ever had the chance, but her heart only began to pour out with doubt and worry. She had already made her call to him that morning, and with each passing day he doesn't reply, the more she gets worried. If he was around Edge, they would have gotten word by now. Tifa was determined to go and set out to find him, but where to start? The rest of the Planet was a pretty big place. What would she say to Barret, if she tells him she'll leave Midgar looking for Cloud? He'll freak, that's undeniable, she could almost hear his bellowing voice demanding her if she's out of her mind. She needed someone to watch over Marlene and Denzel and the bar -

Tifa let herself fall to the ground, her tears flooding her face. She gripped the cloth in her hand, wanting to tear it apart. Shaking her head to gain back her composure, she spoke out loud. To whom, she wasn't sure but maybe Aerith will hear her through her broken sobs, hoping that her friend was still listening somehow.

"What is it like Aerith?" her trembling voice echoed through the walls of her church, the sound amplified to a thousand times than normal. "What is it like being part of the Planet?"

Tifa took out a small handful of anemones, the ones she had also bought from Margie. She hesitated for a moment, wondering if the anemones would ruin the pretty lilies, but in the end proceeded with scooping up a tiny mound and replanting one or two of the smaller, much more delicate flowers alongside the mass of overlooking lilies. She thought of her Mum again, sickly in her bed, dying slowly. She really loved those flowers. When she died Tifa stupidly went off to Mount Nibel, to find her. The flowers grew at Mount Nibel - so why couldn't her mother be there too?

"I know… I know he's looking for you. I _know_ how he feels. Can you help him, please? I need you to desperately help him. I need you to help Marlene, and Denzel. I need you to help them realise that they're strong enough to do this too."

 _But what do_ you _need, Tifa?_

She wasn't sure if it were her own thoughts who asked that question. Her mind answered for her, without saying his name out loud. Looking at her mound of small flowers, she crossed her arms. Tifa's gotta say she was _fairly_ proud of herself. She hasn't planted a single seed in years now.

She watched as a slight breeze suddenly blew against the petals of the flowers, it was strange because she didn't _feel_ the wind herself, but only saw how they made the petals sway gently. The lilies had remained strong and upright, but some of the petals on her anemones had already fallen off.

" _Aerith?!"_ a voice, deep and broken called out from behind her at the doors of the church.

Tifa spun around so fast that she almost lost control of her pivot. Her first instinct was to grab for the leather gloves in her back pocket. She only used it when it was cold outside, or if she needed a better grip on something. She never imagined she would need it for another fight.

Her eyes had to adjust to the sunlight outside, as she tried to make out the figure that came stumbling in, with hysterical breathing and why on _Gaia's Planet_ would he be _looking_ for Aerith _here_? Her mind instantly thought of Cloud as soon as she could make out the edges of unruly hair, but his voice was different. He seemed a lot taller, heck, he was probably miles taller than Tifa even with his back hunched and arms clutching to his side. Tifa took a few paces forward, bringing her arm up to block the sun's glare that reflected on a piece of shrapnel outside, until her heart had fallen to her stomach and her breath suddenly winded out of her when she recognised who it was.

" _Aerith…?"_ he managed to let out, looking at Tifa straight in the eye.

She could see how his pupils dilated, how those blue eyes shone with mako in them, as soon as he realised that the woman before him wasn't Aerith, but another girl he had met a long time ago, who seemed a lot more younger then. But before he could say anything else, his eyes rolled back and he was falling.

Tifa managed to surge forward just in time to catch his weight. Which ended up being a bad idea because he towered over her, and she figured she lost some muscle or some part of her strength these past few years, shocked to see how her arms trembled as she tried to make him stand upright. Instead she plonked down to the ground, his head somehow managing to rest onto her lap, and she saw his face up close, in what seemed like forever. It was a face that every young girl in Nibelheim started to fantasise about ever since ShinRa's visit, but for Tifa it was a face that her defiant youth swore she'll hate forever.

Her hand trembled as she pushed back his hair away from his face and he slightly stirred, muttering something. He felt _real._ She prodded his cheek and his head fell limp to the side closest to her chest. All the blood drained from Tifa's face, she didn't even need to try hard to claw her mind for the memories of this man's name, branded there in her mind as part of the past that frightened her the most.

"You're meant to be _dead, Zack Fair."_ were the only words that she managed to get out.


End file.
